Jim Corr to assume interim leadership of Fianna Fail - Political Quote

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Sunday, January 23, 2011

Jim Corr to assume interim leadership of Fianna Fail

Jim Corr is to assume the leadership of the Fianna Fail party until a new leader is elected, it has been announced today.

Corr (46) found fame with his sisters in the folk/rock band "The Corrs" in the 1990s when he came to the attention of Brian Cowen and FF when he played in their tent for tenners which were tucked into his underpants by tipsy cabinet ministers and their developer friends.

Corr succeeds Cowen following his resignation earlier today.

Corr says he is very comfortable with the job as he knows there is no way that FF are organised enough to be involved in any plans for a New World Order saying "these guys can't even agree among themselves never mind the CIA, Royal Family and international Jewry, though a few of them do look a little like the Lizard People behind 9-11."

Corr's main priorities will be 
  • keeping the FF party together long enough to elect a new leader
  • helping to rebrand the party as a realistic option for the March elections
  • keeping Batt O'Keeffe away from the Lizard People
  • wrapping tin foil around the heads of the cabinet so they are no longer being influenced by "the EU".
  • Mass Dubunking

Meanwhile Cowen's main priorities will be
  • carrying out his duties as Taoiseach
  • keeping a firm hand on the levers of power
  • drinking and singing sad songs
  • keeping a firm hand on his pint
  • more singing
  • keeping a firm hand on the bar
  • keeping his dinner down
  • finding his way home
  • crying
  • making rude calls at 4am to Willie O'Dea and Micheal Martin
  • more crying
  • falling asleep on the stairs in just his underpants

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